Brush Our Teeth Yours Truly

(Reading Time: 4 minutes, or 2 minutes twice a day)

I don’t understand people who brush their teeth twice a day, nor do I understand people who brush their teeth once a day at night before going to bed or first thing in the morning. That people brush their teeth at all is a mystery to me, another mystery I must contend with, piled on the original mystery: why people brush their teeth at all when once a day is more than enough.

The things I don’t understand are multiplying; my un-understanding now applies to such a basic human activity as brushing my teeth. War is another thing I don’t understand, and people who say they really want to talk with me but who only really want me to listen to themselves talking to me. I don’t understand the basics of internet etiquette i.e. how it is not considered rude NOT to return an email or text query within a twenty-four hour timeframe especially by those people who are 34 years old or younger. The more I think about capitalism and the concept of private property the less I understand each; the more I see both as contraptions of greed, lust, and unenlightened self-interest. I don’t understand aging either or why so many people call it a process. I only understand that what is happening to me now once happened to others before me who didn’t understand aging then any more than I do now (stiff knees, sore back, problem with big toe on right foot).

The biggest problem with not understanding (un-understanding) is the profound sense of loss it fosters—that you once understood what you now don’t understand—in those of us who suffer from it. So that we become desperate to understand almost anything..

I’ll never understand people who insist on brushing their teeth after every meal, but I do understand dental floss; dental floss is a real need. You should use dental floss after every meal, unless you prefer a wooden toothpick.