Mac and Cheese (a Sunday Poem Special)*

First, I eliminated plastic from my diet,

then paper.

Carbohydrates were more difficult

as I loved carbos washed down

With mineral water that I was told

was good for me—

it so happens, however, that some water is good

and some not so good.

Protein also became problematical:

how much dead meat should one

Consume over a lifetime?

My dietary dilemma—

That sometimes I feel bad after a good meal

and sometimes good after a bad meal!

So what’s the deal? Not to eat at all?

Or should I eliminate grease, bread, blueberries

And other staples like oatmeal and Cheetohs

and deep-fried mushrooms?

A larger moral question looms…

should I kill my doctor first

And then my lawyer?

*The Sunday Poem Special is a new feature of The Grilled Cheese Report, available to all paid subscribers.