The battle between the old and new soap sellers

Question: is it possible to pose for a selfie while inserting a contact lens?

Answer: it is, but only when wearing a white Marc Jacobs t-shirt for which you paid $500.00.

And who is Marc Jacobs?

A guy who sells expensive t-shirts, that's who, and who's parlayed this phenomenal fashion talent into international celebrity. There are a lot us who wish we could be like Marc Jacobs, a lot of us, but not all of us.

Some of us would rather be the late Lew Welch, poet and creator of the un-selfie, a man who found a way to die without anyone ever finding his body. They found the gun but not the body! Now that takes talent.

Last night I dreamed about a river. There were people in the dream too, but the river was the central character. I don't know if this means that I don't like people or that I'm an environmentalist, or both.

When I woke up this morning I heard Taylor Swift singing, not that I've ever heard Taylor Swift sing, I'm not that unique, to think oneself unique is the height of arrogance.