A history of California Missions

Father Fermin Lasuen always texted ahead, preferring texting to using his cellphone the old fashioned way. In fact, he deplored the telephone, hearing Father Junipero Serra use it so duplicitously.

"I just wanted to hear the sound of your voice," Father Serra would say, calling ahead to Mission San Luis Obispo or Carmel. Father Fermin Lasuen knew Father Serra actually favored the opposite: the last thing he wanted to hear was the sound of the voice of the person he'd called; he hoped they wouldn't answer so that he could leave a message saying he'd called just to hear the sound of their voice.

Father Fermin Lasuen knew for a fact that Father Serra instead wanted to hear the sound of his own voice for his own good, and not for the good of the one he was calling. If the one he was calling actually answered, Father Serra could be charming, polite, guileless to the degree that the one being called would feel special, singled-out for the divine benediction only Father Serra could bestow, but Father Serra would be secretly unhappy in his heart of hearts that he'd made actual contact.

Father Fermin Lasuen preferred the text message. It was certainly more businesslike--words in print are real words--there could be no mistake either in transmission or reception. A text message sent from Mission Santa Barbara to Mission San Miguel would certainly arrive as intended, provide clear direction to the workers, list the provisions needed and so forth. If Father Serra had such a strong need to be loved and admired that he felt it necessary to go to the great length of leaving mis-leading cell phone messages with his minions, that was his problem. Fate would see that he got no further than Carmel.