Agnes Martin

Yesterday had the devil in it.

First I lost my wallet.

Then I lost all the notes I'd kept on my iPhone from November 4, 2014 onwards.

I stayed awake until two in the morning, inconsolable, looking through all the blank spaces in my brain for clues as to the whereabouts of my losses.

In the midst of my devastation I realized how impossible it would be to rebuild my life.

That I'd have to start all over once again and act as if everything was brand new.

I kept thinking the same thing over and over and over, that everything was lost and I'd just have to see the good in it.

Soon, before I knew it, I'd closed my eyes and fallen asleep.

I dreamed that everything I'd lost would be returned to me by morning, and half of it was and half of it wasn't.